Healthy@home clients share their diverse life stories
JOHN and Rita Vandermaat share a romantic history, and dementia can’t change that – they both feel very blessed. Rita has become John’s carer and with help from Centacare, they will be together for a long time yet. Their story goes back to Holland where they were both born. John in Gouda, famous for its cheese as he is quick to add, and Rita 20km away in Rotterdam. But it was Australia that brought them together.
They were youngsters when their families migrated to Brisbane, Rita in 1950 and John six years later when he was 13.
One thing that hasn’t faded is John’s cheeky sense of humour. He recalls their arrival:
“We went straight into the prison camp, I mean the Wacol migrant resettlement camp,” he says with a wicked laugh. “School was hard as I had to learn English as well, but that was a good start.”
Like Rita, he picked it up easily enough and doesn’t speak with an accent. Their parents soon became good friends and were among the founders of the Dutch Migrant Society, now The Dutch Club, in Brisbane in 1952.
There were dances at the German Club in Vulture St and other social activities and, with their parents so often getting together, John and Rita saw a lot of each other and became firm friends.
John’s family moved to Bowen Hills where he worked with his father and brothers as a builder and carpenter, before joining the air force as a radio technician in the late 60s, a job which took him to various air force bases over the next 22 years.
“Oh, the people you meet in those places,” he recalls with a sigh. “It was a wonderful experience.”
Time went by and life intervened. John went his way, married, and had four children, and Rita went hers, married, and had two children.
Fate and a special bond brought them back together
But their families always kept in touch, and fate brought them back together decades later in 1998. They have now been happily married for 20 years.
“We got together and started fresh,” Rita says. “We had two cars, a caravan and $10,000 to our name but we set off on an adventure, earning our way as we went. It was wonderful.”
They went fruit picking from the north down to Shepparton and then managed a caravan park on Phillip Island near Melbourne. After just over two years, with the children missing them, they returned to Brisbane.
“The kids all get on really well and we are one big family. We also have 15 grandchildren between us and that keeps us out of mischief,” Rita says.
Support from Centacare means dementia won’t keep them apart
Five years ago, while they were managing a farm stay in the Sunshine Coast hinterland, John had a heart attack, and after that Rita noticed that he was beginning to struggle. John was diagnosed with vascular dementia and Alzheimer’s disease.
“John has always been a fit and healthy man, and still is, but his brain is giving up. We’ll get through it,” Rita says. “I’ll be looking after him here for a long time yet.”
They live in a low-set home with ensuite, so he knows where to find everything, and is still able to shower himself, although Rita keeps a close watch to make sure he picks up the right shampoo bottle.
Through Centacare, they have a cleaner come once a month and get help with the lawns. Most important though, is his three days a week at Centacare Day Centre at Aspley, where he has become an enthusiastic participant.
When someone calls out “sing, John, sing,” he will reply “oh, here we go again” but always happily obliges. He is an accomplished singer and music has always been part of the household. Both John and Rita sang in a choir as teenagers.
Every six weeks John spends two nights at Centacare’s Pechey Place Respite Cottage at Albany Creek, while Rita catches up on her jobs. She was surprised to find after one stay that he had even learnt to knit.
“We are fine at the moment,” Rita says. “If we can keep going like this for the next few years, I will be very happy. We are blessed and we make the most of every day.”
The Aged Care Diversity Framework
The Aged Care Diversity Framework aims to ensure a high quality aged care system that embraces the diverse characteristics and life experiences of consumers. Older people with diverse needs. characteristics and life experiences may be part of a group or multiple groups that may have encountered exclusion, discrimination and stigma during their lives.
The above article is part of a series that tells the real life stories of healthy@home clients. It has has been approved for publishing by the service provider and client.
Great story. Thanks for sharing!